party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
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I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitshow foam night was such a success
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
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