I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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