Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
