im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
