It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
