my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Just cropdusted the office
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
It's never too late to be topless.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
