Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
