question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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