captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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