He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
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