if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
