there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
