This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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