I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
