she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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