making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
my poor anus
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize