This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
