my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
