are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
No subtext here. People are naked.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
