Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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