farters have to be the big spoon...
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
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