you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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