And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
