"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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