he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
