I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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