he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
