an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
50% drunk capacity currently
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
