my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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