K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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