it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
foreskin is a definite game changer
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
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