butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
