Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
