im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
