Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
