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I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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