why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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