kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize