I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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