It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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