I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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