Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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