And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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