Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
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that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
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Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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