If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
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