I will die if light touches me.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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