I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
