when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
