she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
