I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
